'No One's Priority' published in Cell2Soul

April 18, 2012  

It’s quite a unique feeling, being no one’s priority. It’s freeing in a way ­­—

an independence of sorts. Not necessarily one that you’d wish for but nevertheless

it’s there for the taking. And you’ve been assigned the task and title.
You are now crowned… ‘No one’s priority.’

Does this mean you are lonely?

Not necessarily.

Does this mean you might feel scared at times?

Occasionally.

Does this mean you don’t have anyone in your life?

Of course not.

You have friends, siblings, relatives and acquaintances but are you their priority?

Not if they have partners, parents or children. And if they have grandchildren,

you're dead in the water girlfriend.

Don’t get me wrong. They may be available to you if there’s an actual emergency,
especially if it's theirs,

but in the day-to-day scheme of things, the 9-5’s, the 7 days a week, 52 weekends

in the year, these peeps have someone else to think about, to run to, to share with,

to take care of and it ain’t you. It just ain't you. Don’t believe me? Think about this.

If you’re home-bound with a nasty head cold and need someone to pick you up some

chicken soup with matzo balls and a nose-spray chaser, do you really think

they're gonna drop what they’re doing, and put you before their own loved ones, their child,

their lustful lover or their beloved pet?

Nope!

Well, maybe if it’s a cat.

And, if you wake up in the middle of the night from a bad dream or feel like you’re

gonna hurl your cookies after eating some contaminated food, do you think

really think they're gonna leave the comfort of their own warm bed,

so they can place their cool hand on your forehead to soothe your aching soul and
tell you it's gonna be allll right now baby?

Nope!

But they'll definitely call you in the morning from their hopefully

hands-free cellphone while driving to work after getting their Starbucks coffee,
to 'check-in with you', for a bit.

And when it’s New Years Eve, or X-mas day, or a Sunday afternoon with perfect skies

and a moderate temperature, do you think it’s you they’ll be calling to share it with

no matter what, as if it’s a given, a guarantee?

Nope!

Or how about when you have to go downtown for yet another mammo, ultrasound and

MRI, to follow up on your, ‘now in remissioned’ cancer, and you have to go alone,

because the people in your life, have their own lives and their own priorities
and those priorities, just ain’t you. It just ain’t YOU!

And That reality keeps rearing it’s ugly head more often than you care for it to, and

no matter how much you try to convince yourself that it just ain’t so,

and no matter how many times you watch ‘The Help’ and recite those

magical words to yourself that the black maid said to her little white girl child,

“You is kind, you is smart, you is important,” (and you indeed may be),

there ain’t no denying the fact that you is no one’s priority.

By  Marla  Lukofsky

April 18, 2012